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Archive for June, 2011

Jung tells us that dreams speak and it is worthwhile for us to pay attention to them. Dreams have a way of reminding us of things that may be off balance, things that are deeply rooted in our souls.

So I was at church this morning and events in life made me wonder of the nature of who I am and I realized being connected is an essential part of me. Being connected seems to suggest as well that the connection is to align with the nature of a particular being and not any being as such. In this case, it is me. For the longest time I have been seeking an interpretation of a dream and then an insight occur. A couple of weeks ago I had a dream about right foot being cut off. The dream recurred three times in the same night (it is in my earlier post). The first was a man who was being chased by gangsters and they cut off his right foot. The second was a dog and I saw his foot being cut off. The third was a lady who was told by a church leader to cut off her right foot. As I was pondering this dream I started to see that perhaps there were three areas that alienated me from being connected: my fear (fear of life and its risk, fear of hurting others etc), my being removed from my instinct, and finally how certain unsound theological perspectives have me uprooted.  I then thought of one of my earlier dreams a couple of years ago. I was walking with a friend to a store house. And there was a big refrigerator. She asked if she could open this refrigerator. My response was an immediate no but she open any way. And out came wild animals. I managed to gather them together and push them back to the refrigerator. As I did that I turned to my right. There was a dock by a river and above the dock was a big fish and the fish was dying because it was sitting outside of the water. This second dream too reflects the lost of deep connection with a very strong images of instinct being pushed aside and a more archetypal symbol of Jesus (the symbol of fish in the early church – Icthys) suggesting that my religion was totally removed from the water where the soul resides (the psyche as well as the unconscious).

So the question I now ponder is how to respond to the call of the psyche? Where is the place of spirituality within the particularlity of a certain being?

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I remember a couple of years ago while I was working in my back yard trimming trees and removing leafs, I was pondering deep thought on life’s direction. For certain I was not sure about the path ahead of me and how things would unfold. And so a sense of anticipation was growing and I became a little emotional just reflecting on the path. As I was deep in my cogitation, I remembered looking up and there I saw a flock of birds flying straight in a v-formation. For some reason that moving image was locked into my memory. There was something within that image that brought a sense of comfort. I did not know what it was and I still do not know at this point why it brought a sense of comfort to me. But it did. There was something about the natural world, about a flock of birds flying in a v-formation that was eschatologically assuring. I think what was assuring was a sense that the Divine design of nature takes its course in manner that goes where it needs to go.

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I used to dream dreams and they often were consisted of transformation for the marginalized, healing for the wounded, relief for the oppressed. Then dreams were slow to come by. And the soul became desolate and the longing deepen. I would keep searching for means and ways, for the renewal of dreams. I searched for the most vulnerable and asked myself what role can I play. And the search never ceases because  ‘most’ is a category that changes with time and the socio-cultural context. And I search for the most sustainable ways to offer permanent solutions to these populations. The search immobilizes me because the most sustainable and permanent solution exists, in my estimate, only as an ideology that does not seem able to be translated into the lived experience of every day people. And I started to realize that making a difference is not always eternal in its scope. That we may play a little part in people’s lives and that making a small difference is a difference that is made and it is significant in itself. It may be simply transient and it is ok. One of the most gratifying things during the last couple of weeks is the assignment that I required for students. They each have to do one intentional act of charity. And the most amazing things happen…buying pens from a poor student, driving old people around, buying burgers for the homeless, stop on the freeway to help change tires, spending time with mentally challenged kids, giving ride to needy people etc. Perhaps it is the little transient act of random kindness that makes little difference for people. And it is ok.

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